Sunday, January 09, 2005
Out from hiding
As the readers of this blog have figured out, I am NOT 25. Not that I am obsessed with that fact (just ask my therapist, HE'll tell you).
OK, the truth. Turning 55 has hit me a little hard this year. Maybe it's because of all of the other milestones: my 25th anniversary, my Dad's illness, my older son's 18th birthday, my dogs' 10th. Or maybe it's because something hurts every time I get out of bed.
It's one of the reasons I've started this blog. When too many thoughts turn inward they can begin to become selfish and self-destructive. I decided that it was time to turn them outward in a way that I could no longer protect them.
Ed Cone asked me the other day why I chose to put my name and my picture up on my blog. Sorry Ed, what I told you that day turns out not to be the whole truth. The real reason is very simple: if I am out there for the world to see, then I can no longer hide my real self.
Posting my picture and my real name is a symbol for the real meaning of turning 55. By this point in my life I can no longer deny who I am nor regret the loss of the dreams I had when was 25.
My dreams now are based on the reality of who I am and the comfort that it's all downhill from here.
OK, the truth. Turning 55 has hit me a little hard this year. Maybe it's because of all of the other milestones: my 25th anniversary, my Dad's illness, my older son's 18th birthday, my dogs' 10th. Or maybe it's because something hurts every time I get out of bed.
It's one of the reasons I've started this blog. When too many thoughts turn inward they can begin to become selfish and self-destructive. I decided that it was time to turn them outward in a way that I could no longer protect them.
Ed Cone asked me the other day why I chose to put my name and my picture up on my blog. Sorry Ed, what I told you that day turns out not to be the whole truth. The real reason is very simple: if I am out there for the world to see, then I can no longer hide my real self.
Posting my picture and my real name is a symbol for the real meaning of turning 55. By this point in my life I can no longer deny who I am nor regret the loss of the dreams I had when was 25.
My dreams now are based on the reality of who I am and the comfort that it's all downhill from here.
# posted by Michael Christopher : 1:07 AM
Furl It